


The Glass Ashtray

by dontbeeshy



Series: Bandersnatch: Alternative Endings [2]
Category: Bandersnatch - Fandom, Black Mirror, Black Mirror: Bandersnatch
Genre: M/M, Partners in Crime, Sort-of happy ending, wrote it real quick again
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-05
Updated: 2019-01-05
Packaged: 2019-10-04 20:15:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17311148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dontbeeshy/pseuds/dontbeeshy
Summary: "Stay." Stefan whispered selfishly.Or the one in which Stefan doesn't kill Colin, nor does he let him go.





	The Glass Ashtray

**Author's Note:**

> Stefan gets the third choice we all wish we could have picked.

“I killed my dad”

Saying it out loud made it more real, somehow. He realised all the implications that were laying beneath this reality. He would probably end up in jail. Bandersnatch would probably never be released. Killing him, his own father, would only lead to a bad ending. Once again, he was on the wrong path.

“So, are you gonna let me go or are you gonna kill me ?”

Stefan had killed Colin. He had let him go, too. Both had led to nothing. He already knew that he was doomed to start again, to go through it again. The simple thought of waking up once again on 9th July haunted him.

He stared at Colin for an eternity. He didn’t want to kill him. He had never wanted too. The first time he had gone down this path, he had to do it. He had thought it was the only way out.

He drops the knife on the floor. Colin thanks him and leaves. He doesn’t even hear the other boy’s words; his entire brain is a blur. He hasn’t chosen to drop the knife, it’s almost as if it dropped itself. It is back again, the feeling of losing control. It’s growing stronger and stronger as the timeline progresses.

He can’t let it happen. Not this time. He can’t lose control.

He has to do something.

Please, let him do something.

“Wait!”

Colin turned over with wide eyes. Stefan could tell the other boy hadn’t expected the move. It was bold. It was spontaneous. That greater force that had been controlling Stefan’s life hadn’t planned it. Or maybe it had deliberately given him a chance.

“You said you’d help me.” Stefan recalled. “...Will you ?”

He knew it was a shot in the dark, but for a second, he had been able to take control. He had refused to kill or to let go.

Colin seemed to hesitate; looking at Stefan, then at the wall, back at Stefan, down at the knife.

“Lead me to it.” he concluded.

* * *

 

Somehow, Colin knew exactly what to do, but at this point, Stefan wasn’t even surprised. They chopped up every limb of Stefan’s dad with a terrifying tranquility. Colin told him where and how to cut to make it clean. Stefan learned a lot about anatomy that day.

He called his therapist. Colin went to get rid of the body. How? Stefan didn’t dare to ask. He trusted Colin more than he trusted himself. He wasn’t good at keeping secrets.

Colin was back before the sun set. Stefan showed him the progress he had made with _Bandersnatch_ , the thousands of choices and hundreds of paths and dozens of endings.

“I know what I did wrong now.” he muttered, looking down at the joystick.

“Tell me.” Colin asked with a knowing glare, as if he already knew it, as if he had always known but had waited for Stefan to find it by himself.

“I have to give the player the _illusion_ of choice.”

Colin simply smiled.

* * *

 

They spent the night working on it, going back and forth on different paths. They drank a lot of tea. They smoked; Colin a lot, Stefan a little. He had grown used to it after the many times he had chosen to follow Colin home in a foolish hope that it wouldn’t end up in a bloodbath.

Stefan did most of the job. It was his game, after all. But when he would get too frustrated or too tired, Colin would come closer and give a hand. Four hands on the keyboard worked faster than two. By moments, Colin would just brush off Stefan’s hands and write a full page of code himself. Stefan would sit there and watch the reflection of his own game being written on Colin’s glasses.

And he would pull his earlobe.

At 3:46 AM, the game was finished.

Stefan ended up on the bedroom floor, back against the wooden boards. His dad would usually comment on how he had a bed and didn’t have to lay on such a hard surface, but it’s harder to make comments when your head has been cut off.

Beside him was Colin, sat cross-legged and smoking his seventh cigarette of the night.

“What do you think about this timeline, Stefan ?” he asked with this soothing tired voice people have at nighttime.

“Better than the one in which I kill you.”

“Getting attached much?” the blond boy teased.

“No, I just didn’t get to finish the game in that one. Don’t get too confident.” Stefan smirked.

There was a feeling of familiarity between them that Stefan had never felt before. Maybe it was the night. Maybe it was the pure joy of having finished the game. Maybe it was having hidden a corpse together.

Maybe it was just Colin.

“They are going to catch us eventually, you know.” the blond boy said after taking a long drag. “There’s no way we can escape that.”

“You can still go.” Stefan mumbled. “I’ll tell them I did it all by myself.”

“I can stay if you want me to. It’s your choice.”

Stefan rose up to face him. As always, Colin’s features were emotionless. They kept the secret of their owner’s thoughts remarkably well. Yet, Stefan could catch a glimpse of hope in those dark eyes. Both of them knew that this timeline would only happen once; they had to make the most of it.

“Stay.” Stefan whispered selfishly, almost begged.

“Okay.”

And Stefan kissed him, because he could. Kitty had had Colin in all the other timelines. He deserved to have one, just one.

They smoked a bit more. Made out, too. They talked about everything. Parallel realities, coding, cereals, government conspiracies.

“Do you think this is the good timeline ?”

“There is no good timeline, Stefan. They’re just timelines. They happen.”

Stefan looked down. Next to Colin’s feet, he saw the glass ashtray, still covered in his father’s blood. He hadn't felt like cleaning it up. He needed to keep it that way. Now, it was filled with the corpses of Colin’s roll-ups.

He laid his head on Colin’s chest. “It’s the good timeline.”

He could swear he felt Colin kiss his forehead as he fell asleep.

He didn’t know how much time he had left before the police found out about the murder. Days, months, years if he was lucky. It didn’t matter really, as long as he was with Colin.

**Author's Note:**

> new works coming soon, don't forget to leave a kudo <3


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